a new plan.

I am still trying to decide whether or not I should quit my job. Most days (Monday through Friday) I am pretty sure it is a good idea. Some days I'm scared shitless. I have been single for much of my adult life. That has meant I take care of myself. I have gone to work and paid the bills (or maybe I didn't?!) and made decisions based on not having anyone but myself to fall back on. But now my situation has changed. I have a sugar daddy that will take care of me. Right? There is a part of me that knows that I cannot see into the future and is scared shitless to depend on anyone except myself. So I'm still trying to figure out what the hell to do. It's not that I think it's a bad thing to depend on someone else. I just don't know that I am there yet. I just don't know that we're there yet! We've talked about it alot this weekend and I am feeling a little bit better. Still on the fence but not feeling as shitty about it. I'm feeling a little bit pressured because there is a job opening at work that the executive director and the person leaving the job have asked me to apply for. If I don't turn in my resume this week then I won't be considered for the position. What to do...what to do...

Jesse actually came up with a great idea. He said I should quit my job and audition for every reality tv show there is. Well, except for American Idol because we all know I don't/can't sing. And I'm not a good enough actor to go on and pretend to be one of the people who thinks they can sing really well and are all pissed when Simon, Paula and Randy make fun of them. And there was already an Asian to make fun of a couple years ago so I can't even go that route. William Hung ruined my life. If you know of any reality tv shows that I can apply for, please be kind and let me know, you know, just in case I actually get some balls and quit my job.