conspiracy theory 101

I thought I was enrolled in a class called "Introduction to Social Welfare in the United States." But now I am pretty sure I read the course catalong incorrectly. These are some things I have learned so far:

• Printers and copy machines encode the paper they print on with secret identifying numbers so the government knows where they were printed. They are so secret, you can't even see them. The ACLU knows about it and is fighting this practice. I briefly checked out their website and didn't catch that article. Let me know if you find it.
• The plasma television was developed so the government can use satellites to see into your house. Thank God I don't have one. I don't need one. The neighbors call the cops on me for disturbances in their heads.
• The World Trade Center crash was planned and the government didn't do anything about it. They didn't think it would be such a huge disaster but they forgot to take into account the heat from the jet fuel. The towers were supposed to be damaged, but not that damaged.
• There is a cure for cancer but it is not available because there is too much money to be made from treating cancer. Yes. Because there no money will be made from curing cancer.
• Magic Johnson is no longer HIV positive because he was able to purchase a cure.
• Congress has passed a law stating usage of marijuana for medical purposes is illegal. (Okay, not so much a conspiracy as just wrong information.)

As soon as I learn something new, I'll be sure to let you know.